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Friendships~

I got a friend request from my old best friend from school that too only while I was thinking about her! The girl I terribly fought with and hated till yesterday. Hated her and the whole group. But then, accepting her request felt like a huge rock inside my heart had melted. The rock that I pretended does not exist.
One thing is assured. A friendship can be saved after having a fight and it can ruin if you try to ignore the situation and move ahead. There is this grudge which sets in. Maybe you don't identify it at first but years down the lane you will realize those memories hurt you more. You took an easy way out and that's what you did wrong. They say, if the road seems too easy , you are probably in a wrong direction. We can pretend to not care but in the longer run, we will.
I have two friends I fight with a lot and that is the reason why they are still close. If I had chosen my other tactics over them, they would have not been a part of my life right now. Earlier, I used to avoid arguments because I thought I ll forget about those people after few years. That Never Happened. Whenever school memories used to pass me by, I felt shitty. I wondered if I was really that bad or if it was really them that they did not understand. Why did they bitch on my back? I never did.! Maybe it was them who were not a good friend to me but maybe that was something about me? I will never know the answers. Plus, I don't even remember what kind was I when I was 15! lol. Who does? Today, I know I try my level best to be a good friend to all those people who have made me happy. I don't want to brag but, I think I am (if they forgive my few terrible mistakes, ouch!) Its my final year of college now. I have some hidden fears because of what school did to me. I know we all were immature back then but I don't want to lose my best friends now! I don't want to be hurt by them either. Even if distance separates us, I don't want to have any grudges or wandering thoughts leading to my low self esteem or anything because they are people who were there, every time. Whenever I needed a hug or whenever I wanted a vodka! Whenever I needed to act like a bitch to someone or whenever I wanted to learn a way to impress them! Whenever I needed to make a serious decision or whenever I wanted to go crazy! And not to forget, Whenever it was my birthday!
As the college is about to end (still a year though ..but it will pass when I blink).. I guess its these few friends who are the "best thing" that Ever happened to me! 

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Revisiting.

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