Dark Chocolates

Another year rolled out, and you are still fidgeting with your dreams, aren't you? Life changes year after year. Some disappointments you faced, some challenges you dealt with and you even achieved small goals. But, you aren't proud of yourself, all because "IT'S NOT THE LIFE YOU WANTED", eh? Life is what is happening to you, right now. Even if you like it or not. If you have to change something, step up. If you want to be happy, embrace the niceness that is already around you. How long would you keep fighting with yourself, for the chances you didn't take, for the mistakes you made? STOP. Take a deep breath. Be proud of what you have. Proud of what you did. Give a last look at the year you lived. Embrace the realizations you had. If there is a decision to make, listen to your gut feeling. You ALWAYS know what is best for you. It's only self-doubt and fear that keeps you away from doing things that you want. The best advice somebody gav...

When I was young, Oh, when I was young... Everything was so much fun. Had no dreams, had no pun, but oh, it was so much fun. The hugs from mama, learning skates, learning to ride a bicycle and the dance with papa. The fights with di and the games too.. Telling on her to mom and dad, and the midnight stories too.. No cellphone, no wifi, Even the cable was out, Had a playground, had a school, and there was plenty happiness, no doubt There were friends, who brought plenty smiles Them, I still dream of, After the closing of blinds... And now, Oh its still good,, With the new world around.. but the old days, I will always miss their sound.

How long can one suppress their emotions? A day? A week? A month? It is hard  opening up and letting your vulnerable side out to others. It is insane to keep quiet for the sake of mental peace of someone else so much that your own head stops working. And then one day, the tears come rolling out. Everything in your life seems a blur. A mistake that you can’t solve. Suppressing your feelings might make you feel okay for some time, but they are going to get out eventually. They only grow the more you keep it in. Like a volcano. It is going to burst and burn everything around you. You have problems? Well, face it. Find a solution, no matter what. Talk to the ones that you have to talk to. Don’t just sleep over it every time. Have a spine. Don’t you respect yourself? How long would you hurt yourself by not facing things around you? One day, you will stop enjoying reading those books that you escape in. You will stop watching TV shows that distract you. That is called depress...

After writing five drafts in the last few months, I have decided that I will post whatever I write in this one. Because, you might be the only person who is reading this blog anyway. I have been quite tense about my social skills that have hit a new low. Living in a foreign country and not finding anyone to talk to was one thing, but not wanting to talk to anyone I know and hating everyone active on facebook is a pretty weird level. I won't say I am worried about it, but I do think about it a lot. Unless, I am watching TV shows and writing articles which clearly are not bringing me any closer to me having good "creative" ideas for a book.  I haven't read a book in so long because I was busy making friends with Lannisters and Starks. (GoT, in case you don't know.) But when I am busy doing laundry, wiping the floor ten times a day because I have developed obsessive cleaning disorder out of living alone for the most part of the day, and when I try to sleep...

There are people who claim to love travelling alone. They claim that it helps them know themselves "better" and have some me-time. But, I live in a city where I face language barrier and have to spend a lot of time alone. Thus, when it comes to travelling, I doubt if I would ever want to go to another place far away and wish to do the same. Roam around alone with no one to giggle with. It is hard to accept that you don't enjoy me-time, as other people have this opinion that "intelligent" people would always love to do the same. There are billion intelligent, shit-crazy thoughts that pass through their mind when they are travelling and they can manage everything all by themselves. Why would you want to spend time alone, when you rarely get to enjoy a family time? Where is the world taking you? When you are out there on the beach all by yourself, won't you miss your funny friend who makes you giggle all the time? Won't you want to be with a partner ...

Writing about something that is too close to your heart, isn't always easy. You always have the risk of being exposed. You always wonder what would people think if they read it and know its me? But the real touch, comes with being vulnerable. It comes with being true to your heart and writing whatever it is that you want to, no matter how crazy or how heart-breaking it is. The music of my fingers tapping on the keys, is what I love. The pleasure that comes with releasing those emotions on a blank page is what might be the most satisfying feeling in the world.  But then, we all are a little too afraid, aren't we? it takes time to lose all the little fears and insecurities that you have in you. But, soon you shall be able to if you develop more courage. Know that you must live for yourself and not for others. Know that you need to do what your heart wants without considering how others might feel or say. Yes, you must be sensitive to the world, but not at the cost of you...

While we all struggle to be someone "good enough" for the world to notice, I doubt if that's the agenda we should stick to. We want good jobs, then we want better pay checks, then we want higher posts and so and so. Jeer it up for The Mask Are we ever satisfied in what we currently do? Don't we always have the feeling that we are not where we should be? We don't care if we are loving and empathetic souls, hell, we want to be clever enough to achieve a good rank. After all, people don't succeed these days if they are too innocent. I remember reading the poem  The_Frog_and_the_Nightingale  by Vikram Seth in high school and thinking, damn, the poem says some brutal truth. We have a habit of pitying ourselves, no matter where we stand. There are always people in worse situations than us, but we keep comparing to those who "seem" better off. Well, it is good to have a dream. But is it good to exhaust yourself with that insatiable feeling? We don...